Who are you protecting?

Hey Everyone. Happy Labor Day. I hope you are all having a great weekend.
Today I wanted to talk about how we sometimes avoid situations in life, or resist moving forward towards feeling better because we are stuck in protection mode. When I say protection mode I mean we are still protecting that little person inside us, you can call it whatever you want, because we've never given them the opportunity to move forward.

As a child, I was often very fearful of people and the unknown. We all have instances from childhood that we would rather forget. But the problem that faces us as adults is that we never pay attention to that little person who is still afraid, angry and/or fearful. So, in turn, when we are faced with obstacles or situations that we feel are uncontrollable or bring up fear (change) we sort of resort, subconsciously, back to that little person. This does not help that person to move forward. So he/she is stuck, leaving us in stuck in the here and now wondering why it is so difficult to grow.

Can you picture who that little person is? I call mine "Little Kerri." A while back, I was having issues that were directly related to my childhood. I sought out the assistance of a professional to deal with these issues, along with using the principles that I've outline in my book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women. I did an exercise with the doctor that made a lot of sense to me. Role playing it is called. I had to actually act as if I were speaking to "Little Kerri." I had to actually feel and revisit the emotion that she was still feeling. I had to make a commitment to make changes to insure her security and well being. This helped me greatly. Once I realized that I was still overprotecting her, I learned that I was responsible for her ability to move forward and grow which would insure my growing and changing today.

It may sound strange to you and a little wierd. That is good. It means you are thinking about it. Visualize this person. Make an effort to comfort that person. Be responsible for that person. Many of us know that when we became parents, we were forced to face many of our fears head on and had no choice but to conquer the fears for the good of our children. We are role models. We have to at least act as if we are okay.

Try to be that role model, that strong mother/father to that little person inside you that you've forgotten about. When fears arise, think of that little you and realize that what and how you respond to situations directly affects your little buddy. Visualize how "he/she" would feel if you made the change you've been trying to make. Their response will carry you to the next level of empowerment. They will then be able to move forward out of their fearful place. Imagine that every decision you make effects them. Remember, we are stronger for others.

Who is your little person you've been protecting?
How do your actions throughout the day effect them?
Are you willing to start nurturing them to move forward?
What actions can you take to insure your success?
Who are you still protecting?

Let me know what you think of this "little" concept. It's helped me greatly and I know if you are willing, it will help you. Remember, being openminded to new ideas is what will help you begin to change. Baby steps!

I would love to hear some feedback from all of you related to today's and other blogs I've written. I am hoping that you are beginning to make the changes in your lives that will help you move forward and not be stuck. I know for me, that these blogs are keeping me on track as I walk the path. There is always more work to do on ourselves and there is always room for growth.

You can visit me at my website www.kerricartelli.bravehost.com and learn more about how you can begin living today. What would be the most important question you would ask me related to finding your power within? AskKerriCartelli the question so that we can start a dialogue. I can answer any questions or discuss an issue that has been holding you back from making the necessary changes in your life. Or email me at kerricartelli@yahoo.com. I would love to hear from you.

And always remember, we are in this together.

Kerri