I'm Back!!!!!

Hey Everybody. I am sorry I haven't blogged for a while. I decided to take a break from my book promotion, blogging, etc for a few days. I needed to focus on my family and my own well being. Sometimes we all have to take a quick break from all of our extra curricular activities to take stock of how we are dealing with life as we know it and what direction we want to go in.

This week, I had to stop and look down at my feet. I had to remember that life is where I am right at this moment. I had to really understand what I was feeling, where I was going and was I focussing on what is truly important.

I have mentioned in past blogs that I can't stand having a crazy house. Some would beg to differ, but I am talking about my standard of living, not anyone elses. So, I looked around and felt like I had begun to neglect what my priorities are. Whether that is true or not, I felt that way. I spent this week cleaning out my house of all the things I hadn't looked at in a year. I sorted through the thousands of papers that were piling up in filing cabinets, and so on.

What I realized this week is that I am exactly where I need to be. I am an all or nothing person. I am either doing it all or I am doing nothing. But, the difference between the me now and the me prior to my book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women, is that I am okay with being this way. I am okay with going full force into a situation and then sitting back and taking in and analyzing my situation. I can then objectively look at a situation and make a decision that isn't emotional.

Well, I am glad to be back. My blogging really helps me get through my days and I hope it is helping you too. I am beginning a new venture in addition to everything else. I will slow introduce you all to it and hope that it will help change your lives as it has changed so many others.

If you can't wait to find out what it is, email me and I'll tell you all about it.

And remember, we are in this together!

How do you spend your weekends?

Hey you beautiful ladies out there! I been thinking about this blog and how it actually serves its purpose. I have decided to not just try to sell my book, but to also offer other resources besides the book for you women (and men) who read every day.

Today, because it's Friday, I want to think about how we re-energize ourselves over the weekend. Read this online article, 6 Ways to Find More Time for Yourself . Many of you who have jobs and careers have only the weekend (if that) to get anything done. What do you do for yourself? Do you take any time for yourself to fill up your well?

Let me explain the "well" concept. Think of your body as a well. If it's full, we are doing well emotionally. Everytime we give of ourselves, some of our well is drained. Marriage, children, work. These are all parts of our lives that take from the well.

The way we refill the well is by doing things that are good for our bodies and minds. Reading, exercising, taking nice walks, etc. If you don't refill the well when it is low, you run the risk of going dry. What happens when the well runs dry? Just imagine a car without gas. It stops.

So, you need to refill your well over the weekend.
How are some ways we can refill the well?

1. Make a deal with your spouse to take the kids out for a little while.
2. Lay on the couch and read the book you've been trying to find time to read.
3. Hire outside help to do all those little things you have to take care of in your free time, i.e. garbage, lawn care, housecleaning, laundrey. You'd be surprised how inexpensive it can be if you shop around.
4. Order groceries through an online source. Stop and Shop has a service called Peapod.
5. Read online articles on how to revitalize. Some of your "healthy habits" may back fire on you. Read the article, Healthy Habits That Zap Your Energy. You may want to rethink your weekend ritual.

Making time for yourself and refilling your "well" will keep you happy and ready to face your family and the week ahead.

My intention for you today is to keep the faith. You are on the right path when you consider your well being just as much as everyone else's.

And always remember, we are in this together.

My Dilemma!

Hello all you beautfiul ladies (and men) out there in cyber world. Today I am thinking about priorities. I find that I keep coming back to this issue pretty frequently.

I find that being a stay at home mom is great. I am home. I can take care of the house. Keep things in order, etc. But what happens when something else is thrown into the mix? Say....a book being published. Getting a little job. Holy Cow!!! It's then and only then that I realize how much work it is to take care of the house and keep things in order.

I've been dealing with this issue since I got my book published in June. Mothers feel guilty when they're doing anything else besides their "wifely" duties and taking care of the kids.

So, how do I find that happy medium?

I have to organize and set up my time accordingly. Is that easy. No!!!

So, today I am working on organizing my time so that every one in our family is happy.
That is my job. Noone ever said being a mom was easy.

How do you organize your time?

My intention for you today is to work at finding a balance in your life. Baby steps!

And always remember, we are in this together.

Kerri

Karma! Karma! Karma!

Hey Everyone. Did you ever wonder why people are always talking about doing the next right thing? Whenever I think about doing something that puts negative vibes out there, I always think about Karma. If you don't know what Karma is, I will tell you MY definition. I think Karma is the energy you put out into the universe. I think that if I am thinking good thoughts and carrying out positive actions related to myself, my family and people I come into contact with, it comes back to me.

There are a lot of people out there who have the "What's in it for me?" attitude. Maybe it's because they grew up with nothing and are always trying to catch up or maybe it's because they just don't think any actions they take in a positive direction affect anyone. What I've learned in my short lifetime is that every action I take be it positive or negative come back at me in some shape or form. There are a lot of different schools of knowledge that call Karma something else. But, when it comes down to it, it's all the same thing, whatever you call it.

For instance, I tend to take on too much at one time. Whether it be volunteering for something, helping someone out, etc. People close to me are always saying, "You are taking on too much, you have enough to do already with three kids." And, sometimes I listen. But, then there's that nagging feeling that is in my gut. I know that when I help others, it comes back to me. I know that when things get tough around my house or in my life, that the help I receive from others is directly related to the help I put out there. Miracles come in disquise if you're not looking for them. You get what you give.

So, enough preaching from me. I was just feeling good today about my life knowing that whatever I put out there will come back. And, right now, it's coming back. Nough' said!

My intention for you today is to think about what you're doing to help others in your life. Have you locked yourself up in your little world, waiting for good stuff to come? Or, are you out there giving of yourself, just a little, knowing that your a good person and that the gifts that have been given to you are not in vain?

I put my positive intentions out to you all that come across my blog today.

And always remember, we are in this together!!!!!

When Life Throws Us Curveballs!

What do you do when life throws you a curveball? Do you run in the house and hide under the covers, or do you stand up and say, "keep it comin'!"

This is a hard question. Every situation warrants a different response. There are many instances where we can say, I have no control over this and trust that because you always do the next right thing in life, that the right thing will happen for you. But, what do you do when Murphy's Law applies? And what do we do about the things we can control?

How willing are you to make the changes in your life that are imperative to survival at the time? Can comfortablility be a factor? Would you rather use the credit cards than have basic cable? Would you rather dip into that very little savings account so the family can go to the movies, knowing full well that you'll end up in the negative? I mention financial issues because these are the issues that can make or break us emotionally, relationship wise, etc.

These are the issues we can control!

Take stock of how willing you are to make changes today. Look honestly at yourself when you need to make a change that will make you uncomfortable. Pay attention to all of the little excuses that pop into your head as to why I just cannot do that.

Today is a short one. We attended my little neices birthday party on Saturday. My brother was not there in body but he was there in spirit. We all miss him but I know he was there.

And always remember, we are in this together!

Kerri

Walk the walk!!!!!!

Hey Everyone. Well, it's been a "blah" week. Raining in Connecticut, daughter sick, house bounding with clutter....what to do, what to do, what to do.

It's sooooo easy to just sit back and feel sorry for ourselves, isn't it? That little devil jumps on the first opportunity to pull you back into your old thinking. Be very aware of this. You are going great, feeling great and one little thing happens to affect your ego and bang. There she/he is whispering in your ear. Telling you all of the things you thought were gone forever, but, guess what? Your little devil is just waiting for that moment when you appear weak or vulnerable and then just starts that whole dialogue again.

Aren't we lucky we have the tools we need to quiet that voice? There's that split second when you make the decision to either sit back and feel sorry for yourself or say, "to hell with you" and shake off the dust of the day and start over.

Of course it's more comfortable for us to sit back and feel sorry for yourselves. But, if you actually gave yourself time to do that, you wouldn't like it that much.

So, we decide to move forward in our quest for empowerment. And that's just it, isn't it? It's a journey to empowerment. Every step and every decision no matter how small either moves us toward or away from finding our power. What will you decide today? Will you move toward or away from your power? That's right folks! It is completely up to you!

Making difficult decisions that affect not only you are the hardest. We innately know what the right things to do are, yet we hold onto that little bit of selfishness. Why should I do this? I know it's better for the family, but why should I have to make changes?

These are the big ones although they seem small. Watch out for that small stuff! It's the small stuff that creeps in and piles up.

My intention for you today is to stay strong in your convictions and stay on your path to empowerment regardless of what road blocks go up. Walk the walk!!!!!!

We are powerfull women. Don't forget that! You choose who you want to be!

And always remember, we are in this together!

Kerri

HELP!!! I CAN'T FIND MYSELF! WHERE DID I GO????

Have you every found yourself asking, "Where did I go?" One day you wake up and don't know how you got where you are? Well, welcome to Mommyland!!!!

Now, don't get me wrong. I love being a mommy! I would not change one decision I made related to having children. I just know that in the beginning of motherhood it is so exciting. There is a flurry of attention when that first little bambina/o is in your belly. Everyone is asking YOU how you feel. Everyone around YOU is smiling. Everyone around YOU is giving YOU little gifts for the baby. Attention, attention, attention.

Finally, after all the baby showers are over and the furniture is all set up and the pretty painted dressers are done, etc.....the day comes! Even in the hospital it is a flurry of activity. All of your friends are waiting for the arrival. Your mom, your dad, grandma, grandpa, yada, yada, yada. Then the pain begins, but you can handle it. After all, everyone is counting on you. Your husband is waiting patiently, anxiously, he loves you soooooooooo much.

Here come's baby. REALITY!!!!!!!!!!!

Now, this part of the story changes a little. Suddenly, you are no long YOU, now you are MOMMY. Guess what? You are no longer the center of the universe. Baby is. This is where I allowed Kerri to slip away, and Mommy to creep in and take over. Kerri, the musician, teacher, writer, etc, etc, etc, was gone. Mommy needed to take care of baby. Mommy needed to shop for baby. Mommy needed to entertain baby. Mommy needed to not focus on herself, she needed to take care of baby.

Do you understand where I am going with this?????

So, fast forward seven years later 9or however many years it is for you) and Mommy is still taking care of baby, but now it's three babies. And these babies are growing. These babies are riding school buses. These babies are watching Nickelodeon and arguing. These babies no longer need Mommy to wipe their heiny's.

Here we are. Here I am asking myself, "How did I get here? Where is Kerri?"
That is the million dollar question. But, what is the answer? How do I find myself?

In my book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women, I will teach you how to rediscover yourself!

There is a lot of guilt associated with reconnecting with yourself and splitting up the Mommy persona. It's okay to be Mommy. In fact, it's wonderful. But, it is not okay to not be YOU. It is not okay to live and die by others needs. Guess what happens? One day, you look in the mirror, if you can find one that just doesn't show your face, and you say, "Holy !@#$%!!!"

When you can accept that there is something different about yourself and become willing to make the change, then you are ready to read my book. You are ready to rediscover your power.

The first step to rediscovering yourself is to get reacquainted with the women you were prior to Mommydom.

Here are some tips to find yourself:

1. Take out some old photo albums
2. Look through the pictures.
3. Recognize how you are feeling or how you felt about yourself then.
4. Read some old journals you wrote way back when.
5. Think about what you did then to be good to yourself and make a list.
6. Where were you working then? Were you a professional? Figure out how you can reincorporate this into your life.
7. Did you have a passion or dream that you wanted to fulfill besides Motherhood.
8. If motherhood was your dream, what can you do to create that picture of what you thought your life would be today.
9. Make a commitment to yourself to re-connect with YOU.
10. Buy my book and start reading!

Let me know what you think.

If you are already in this place of balance and positive thought, how did you do it?

Share with us.

Remember that you alone will create your life to be what you would like it to be. No one else is responsible for where you are today. Together, we can rediscover the woman inside of us and bring her to the surface. Who you used to be will be twice as good today if you can merge the two identities.

Imagine how wonderful it would be for your children to meet the person your husband fell in love with.

And always remember, WE ARE IN THIS TOGETHER.

Kerri

Clear out the "clutter" in your life!!!! FREEDOM!!!

Well Folks. Today is a new day in my home. Yesterday I cleaned out the bedrooms. I cannot believe how much stuff we can accumulate over such a short period of time.

I think cleaning out my house is like cleansing my spirit. I feel like I am starting fresh. Starting on the right foot going into the new season. It is also a great way to see how you have been behaving. When I find a lot of stuff that I didn't even know I had or things I purchased that was never even touched, I have to take a good look at myself and wonder how much I am respecting my husband who works day in and day out to "bring home the bacon." I think, in my case, it's a direct reflection of how much I am thinking of his efforts when I am throwing our money away.

This all started last week when I was yelling at my children to clean up the toys. My middle daughter said, "Mommy, I can't clean up, there are too many toys!" She then continued to ask if I could "get rid" of some of them. I was baffled. Here I am buying things for them that I thought they wanted. What I realized was that I was getting things for them that "I" always wanted when I was young.

So, today is a new day. I've decided to give my children the gift of waiting for things that they truly want.

I remember going on vacation in North Carolina with my family. We stayed in a beautiful condo. All we had with us was a week's worth of clothing and the kids had backpacks of toys. I did a little load of wash every day. Straightened up the few items in the apartment and was in total bliss. I mention this because that is how I would like my house to be. Less is more.

How do you handle all the "clutter" in your life?

Let me know what you think. I would love to hear from you.

My blog today is a little haphazard and not very "deep" but, I think I've gotten my point across.

My intention for you today is to try to clear out some of the "clutter" in your life. Whether it is material or emotional. Give yourself the gift of starting fresh. It will lift you up.

And always remember, we are in this together!

Kerri

Do you have an Emotional Hangover Today????

Hi Everyone. Don't forget to go to Inside Success Radio and cast your vote for me to be interviewed. I need all the help I can get.

When I was younger and much more emotional than now, I would have instances where my emotions were completely out of whack. Whether it be over a break up, stress, work or anything that would lead me to a meltdown I would be totally exhausted the next day. I would find myself wondering why I was so worn out.

I finally realized, with age and wisdom (I think), that I was emotionally hungover. Now many of you out there know what a "hangover" is, but for those who have been living under a rock, I'll explain it. A hangover is typically associated with too much indulgence in alcohol. The next day, you feel like you were run over my a truck. It is because your body is dehydrated and it is recovering from the abuse it took.

Emotionally when we put our minds through the ringer, the next day, it tries to recuperate. It's the same thing. I bring this up today because yesterday was 9/11 and many, many of you were emotionally distraught. So, today you may wake up thinking, "Well thank God I got through that" and still feel awful. You're tired, irritable and not really feeling like going through the day.

I am suggesting that today you be gently on yourself. Don't make those big decisions today. If you have some sick time, take the day off and be good to yourself. Send the kids to school and watch movies. Eat for Christ's sake! Take a long bubble bath. Since summer is ending, walk around your house and cut some flowers that will be dead in a few weeks. Put them in a vase and look at them. (That's my favorite thing!) And for those who have some extra cash laying around, go to get a facial, pedicure, etc. Do something you normally wouldn't do for yourself. And accept it! I'll say it again for those who blocked it out. Accept the kindness from others.

You must be gentle on yourself. It's extremely important that you deflate that stress. Even more important.....if you didn't cry yesterday.....do it! Sadness comes out in many different ways. We've talked about this before. Let yourself go. You'll feel a world of difference later.

How will you deal with your emotional hangover today?

Let me know what you did to get through this day. I want to know what you think and how you are feeling.

My intention for you today is to be good to yourself.
Follow the principles in the book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women:

• Let others help you feel better. Call your women!!!! Maybe they need you.
• Dance in the living room to some old music.
• Shake the dust off your journal and write.
• Sit in the yard and listen to the birds talking.
• Tell your little devil to take the day off.
• Make some declarations in the mirror and believe them to be true.
• Talk to your God today. He's listening!
• Let it out. Let it out. Let it out.
• Accept your husband or friend's offering of love and understanding graciously without argument.
• And remember tonight when you lay down to sleep to record what you've done RIGHT today. Remind yourself that you are doing well. That you are living a good life. Be grateful for what surrounds you, even if it is not exactly what you want.

And always remember, we are in this together.

Kerri

How will you get through this day? 9/11

Good Morning! Well, today's a very sad day for the people of the United States of America. We reflect on the attacks of September 11th 2001. My heart and thoughts go out to all of you who may have lost loved ones on that day.

Many of us mourn for those who were lost because we all lost something on that day. Whether it be our feeling of security and safety within this country or children that have since then gone of to war to fight for that slice of freedom that slipped away on that day. If we think of the sixth degree of separation, we would recognize that in some way, we all knew someone who knew someone and so on. We were all affected. Some worse than others.

I know for me, many young men from my old neighborhood in the Bronx lost their lives on that day. When I grew up in the Bronx, for many of the young people, you either became a cop or a fireman. So, I need not go on. Many yound men were lost.

I am further saddened personally today because it is my little neice's third birthday. As some of you may know, I lost my brother Billy last month in a car accident. His daughter's birthday was a big event for him. She was his proudest achievement. I send all of my love and thoughts to her and my sister-in-law today.

So, how do we tap into our "Power" today with all of this saddness surrounding us?
Do we hide out in our houses in fear?
Do we get angry and hurt others, continuing the chain of destruction?
Do we blame God and insist that we are in fact alone on this earth?

How will you get through this day?

In my case, I will feel. Whatever it is, I will feel. I won't hide out! I will try not to be angry! I absolutely never blame my God for anything that happens on this earth.

Today, I will go the my church, light a candle for my brother and all of those lost on this day five years ago. I will say a prayer for all of the families that are struggling today and every day since 9/11. And, I will say an extra special prayer for my sister-in-law who will struggle today with her daughter because she can no longer celebrate her daughter's birth with her husband.

Today is indeed a very sad day. Feel it. Mourn. Be grateful that we were all given the gift of freedom, love and life. After all, we continue to live.

How will you live today?

I will get through my day being grateful for this great country I live in. I will be grateful for my husband and my loving family. And I will thank my God for all of his gifts that I very often overlook.

My intention for you today is to live in gratitude and feel your emotions. It is okay to feel sadness. Try not to "not feel" today. If you find yourself saying, "I am trying not to feel bad" then realize that your are not feeling. Feel the emotion, let the feelings out and understand that you are human. Humans are emotional creatures. We continue living and feeling whether we like it or not. Give yourselves that gift. Better yet, help someone else get through this day and know that we need each other.

And always remember, we are in this together.

Kerri

CALLING ALL BLOGGERS!!!!!!!

I NEED YOUR HELP!!!!!

I am scheduling a Virtual Book Tour for my very first, newly published book;
What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women.

I need bloggers who would you be interested in interviewing me for my book tour.

The format is:

I send you the book (electronically)
You read the book.
You review the book on your blog prior to the interview.
You write up about 10 questions related the book.
You send me the questions via email.
We then decide on a date for the interview.
You post the tour itinerary on your blog site.
You post the interview on your blog site.

In turn, I post everything on my blog also.
Anyone else who interviews me for their blog does the same thing. And so on, and so on............

FREE ADVERTISING PEOPLE!!!!!

How does that sound?
I appreciate your reading this announcement and look forward to hearing from you.

Email me with your response or comment. I'd love to know what my fellow bloggers think of this idea.

Are you part of the solution?????

Do you express your individuality and uniqueness or do you follow along with the herd trying to look, act, and be part of the group. If there's one main issue that will inhibit you finding your power within, it is not being yourself.

When I moved to Newtown, CT from the Bronx, NY five years ago, I found myself smack dab in this situation. In the Bronx, there were so many different types of people that I fit right in. Feeling that you fit in is important to people. I never thought of myself as different from everyone else. When we moved up to CT, I found myself engulfed in self doubt. I was unsure of myself and wanted to be like everybody else. I could clearly see how I was different than everybody else.

I started to behave differently with my children. I would peek out the window and if the kids were out with their bikes, I would gather up my children, make sure they were properly dressed and run outside and try to fit in.

WHAT HAPPENED TO ME?????

What I realized, and it took a while, was that I am me. I'll say it again. I am me. I am different from many people, sometimes for the better and sometimes for the worse. But, I've learned to embrace myself for who and what I am and love me. I no longer peek out the window. I know longer feel self conscious when my kids are playing outside making "too much noise." I am what my God created and I am okay.

How many of you can identify with these feelings?
How many of you find yourself tirelessly trying to fit in with the "group?"
Do you constantly second guess yourself?
Do you find that you are never quite happy with you?
How do you handle situations such as these? Now be honest!

I want to hear from you. I want to know what other women (and men) are doing to find their Power Within.

I finally found the secret to being empowered. All these principles are listed in my book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women. Get the book. Start following the principles. Rediscover you and begin to learn how to love yourself. It worked for me and it will work for you if you can remain honest.

My intention for you today is to be yourself. And like it! If you are not there yet, then try to like it! Recognize the beauty that is you and write down how it makes you feel. Journal, journal, journal.

And always remember...We are in this together!!!

Tell that little devil to get lost!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hey Everyone. I am sitting here thinking about priorities. Now I know I wrote about this a couple of weeks ago. But what I noticed was that the issue keeps coming up.

I have been feverishly working on promoting my book. It's a lot of work but I love it. What I did notice was that when things become difficult and all the RAH RAH for Kerri dies down. My little devil (chapter in book) starts talking to me.

It's starts saying;

"You're wasting your time."
"No one want to read your book."
"Just go back to your old ways and stop trying to be successful."

Normally in the past, I would have said, "You know, you're right." I mean really, why would a poor kids from the Bronx think that she could be successful at something like this? Why should I be different from anyone else? Why try so hard? Life ultimately sucks anyway, Right?

Wrong!!!! But since, I've written the book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women I see know where these thoughts are coming from. I say to my little devil, "you are wrong and I am not quitting!!!!" No matter how much my old tapes play and my little devil talks to me I will persevere and continue on the path to empowerment. I am empowered. I am empowered every time I tell that voice to go away. Every time I replace that thought with the words, "I am unstoppable!!!!!!!"

Because you know what folks, I am. And so are you. We all are. We just have to make that decision.

How are you feeling today?
Is your little devil talking to you?
Are you trying to achieve something, but keep hitting that wall of doubt?
How can you change that?
What can you do to know that you are unstoppable?

Let me know what you think. Send me your questions and comments. Let's start a dialogue!

My intention for you today is to know that no matter what is going on in your mind, and how many self defeating comments come in, you can forge through and refocus.

And as always, we are in this together.

Who are you protecting?

Hey Everyone. Happy Labor Day. I hope you are all having a great weekend.
Today I wanted to talk about how we sometimes avoid situations in life, or resist moving forward towards feeling better because we are stuck in protection mode. When I say protection mode I mean we are still protecting that little person inside us, you can call it whatever you want, because we've never given them the opportunity to move forward.

As a child, I was often very fearful of people and the unknown. We all have instances from childhood that we would rather forget. But the problem that faces us as adults is that we never pay attention to that little person who is still afraid, angry and/or fearful. So, in turn, when we are faced with obstacles or situations that we feel are uncontrollable or bring up fear (change) we sort of resort, subconsciously, back to that little person. This does not help that person to move forward. So he/she is stuck, leaving us in stuck in the here and now wondering why it is so difficult to grow.

Can you picture who that little person is? I call mine "Little Kerri." A while back, I was having issues that were directly related to my childhood. I sought out the assistance of a professional to deal with these issues, along with using the principles that I've outline in my book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women. I did an exercise with the doctor that made a lot of sense to me. Role playing it is called. I had to actually act as if I were speaking to "Little Kerri." I had to actually feel and revisit the emotion that she was still feeling. I had to make a commitment to make changes to insure her security and well being. This helped me greatly. Once I realized that I was still overprotecting her, I learned that I was responsible for her ability to move forward and grow which would insure my growing and changing today.

It may sound strange to you and a little wierd. That is good. It means you are thinking about it. Visualize this person. Make an effort to comfort that person. Be responsible for that person. Many of us know that when we became parents, we were forced to face many of our fears head on and had no choice but to conquer the fears for the good of our children. We are role models. We have to at least act as if we are okay.

Try to be that role model, that strong mother/father to that little person inside you that you've forgotten about. When fears arise, think of that little you and realize that what and how you respond to situations directly affects your little buddy. Visualize how "he/she" would feel if you made the change you've been trying to make. Their response will carry you to the next level of empowerment. They will then be able to move forward out of their fearful place. Imagine that every decision you make effects them. Remember, we are stronger for others.

Who is your little person you've been protecting?
How do your actions throughout the day effect them?
Are you willing to start nurturing them to move forward?
What actions can you take to insure your success?
Who are you still protecting?

Let me know what you think of this "little" concept. It's helped me greatly and I know if you are willing, it will help you. Remember, being openminded to new ideas is what will help you begin to change. Baby steps!

I would love to hear some feedback from all of you related to today's and other blogs I've written. I am hoping that you are beginning to make the changes in your lives that will help you move forward and not be stuck. I know for me, that these blogs are keeping me on track as I walk the path. There is always more work to do on ourselves and there is always room for growth.

You can visit me at my website www.kerricartelli.bravehost.com and learn more about how you can begin living today. What would be the most important question you would ask me related to finding your power within? AskKerriCartelli the question so that we can start a dialogue. I can answer any questions or discuss an issue that has been holding you back from making the necessary changes in your life. Or email me at kerricartelli@yahoo.com. I would love to hear from you.

And always remember, we are in this together.

Kerri

Do you respond or react??????

Hey everyone. I was thinking of this topic because when I was younger and didn't know much, oh what a few years does to you, I definately didn't have a good grasp on response and reaction. If anything happened in my life that threatened my being in control or caused me to fear in any way, I reacted. And boy did I react!

Let me explain my outlook on the difference between reaction and response. When I RESPOND to something, it is without emotional attchment. I don't lose control of how I am feeling about the situation or issue. I can think clearly, think it through and see the truth. Then I can deal with the circumstance and move on with my day in my power.

When I REACT, I am usually not thinking clearly. I am definately in my emotions and usually the outcome is not good.

Let's take a real life experience or scenario. I call up the cell phone company because my phone service isn't working. Now, I know I paid the bill. I know I didn't damage the phone in any way and there shouldn't be any problem. Right?

I am on the phone on hold for a good 20 minutes knowing that when I get an operator everything will work out fine. I am in my power thinking clearly. Great!

The operator gets on the phone, I give her all the information, she says, "No problem, let me transfer you to ................" Okay, this is normal, I'll only have to hold for a few seconds. She transfers me, it rings, and.................dial tone.

Now, be honest here. What would you do???????

I have to say that my first REACTION is F!@#$%^!!!!
Maybe I want to throw the phone through the window.
Maybe I decide I am going to call back and give them Hell.
How dare they treat ME this way.
ANGER!!!!!

So, based on the principles in my book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women, I stop. Take a deep breath. Realize that it wasn't personal. I have to make the decision. Am I going to call back? Am I going to wait? So, I decide to RESPOND. I call back and explain what happened and because I didn't flip out, the operator really helps and I didn't ruin my day.

It's clear to me what the better outcome was. I know that if I weren't living in my power, I would have gotten nowhere. I would have let this one little phone call ruin my day. Maybe my week.

When I can stop, breath, and think clearly in moments of frustration and/or extreme emotion, my life is much easier.

What do you think?
What would you have done?
Do you have any suggestions about how you would have behaved differently?
Let me know.
Go to AskKerriCartelli and write away!!!! I look forward to hearing from you all.

My intention for you today is to be able to recognize your emotions. Are you reacting or responding. Take a look at yourself. Be honest. This one little (or big) exercise can change how you are feeling in a major way. Try it and let me know how you do. I welcome your comments and stories. I'll post some of them on my website.

And always remember, we're in this together!

Do make promises, or do you commit???????

Hey everyone. Hope you are all well and living in your power. Today I am writing about the difference between making promises and making commitments. I know for myself that when I promise something it seems almost childish. I don't take the word too seriously. Instead, when one of my kids asks me to do something and they say, "do you promise", I hear in my head, "will you commit to this?"

Here's and experience I had yesterday. My son is getting older and wanted me to make his room like an "office" yesterday. I "promised" to help. So......when he came home from school and asked, "Are we going to make my office", I really didn't feel like it. But.....I promised. And like I said, in my mind I committed, to help him. And so we made his office. He was elated and feeling very grown up. He made signs for his door, listened to Rock n' Roll in his room, and was happy. Happy until he wants the next thing. You know how that goes.

I want to pose a question to you all. How seriously do you all take your commitments you make to others and yourself? I think that every time we make a commitment and break it, it changes us just a little bit, for the worse. We know in our subconscious that we didn't follow through with something again. All that does is damage our progress in changing and stifles growth.

In the past, I was the queen of starting things I didn't finish. I would start them, become totally obsessed and then just stop. You can read all about this and other issues in my book, What a Difference a Day Makes: A Survival Guide for Women. What I realized, and is one of the principles in my book, is that I was searching for something. I was searching for something to fill me up. Like I've said before, I wasn't living in my Power and I was always trying to fill up that space that was empty. I had a wonderful family, great husband, kids and was generally happy, but was still always searching, always searching. The problem was that I didn't realize I was searching for anything. I truly believed that what I was doing at the time was what I wanted to do. And I would fight you to the bone to prove it.

Once I realized what I was up to, and how it was affecting me, I began to make the change. I began to develop the tools I've laid out in the book, and learned how to get through the struggles and come out the other end happier.

What do you think?
How do you get through your day?
Do you make promises or commitments?
Are you using the principles in the book to help you?
Have you begun to see anything in your life that would cause you
to want to make the change?

Email me and let me know what you think. Ask me questions. Let's start working together to find our path to empowerment.

My intention for you all today is to start finding your Circle of Sisterhood. Notice if you are making empty promises or are you committing and keeping those commitments. Go to my website and see how you can begin finding your Circle and start on the journey to finding your Power Within.

I am going to be setting up a "Live Chat" on my website. A sort of impromptu Circle of Sisterhood meeting. Just check out my sight for the date and time. Let's all get together informally and start finding each other and walking down the path to empowerment.

It will change your life as it did mine.

And always remember, we are in this together!